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A survey of sex education literature confirms parents' self-reports regarding sex information imparted to their children. With relatively few exceptions, young children (and even teenagers) are taught that "boys have a penis and girls have a vagina," without further linguistic distinctions made regarding the sensitive external genitals of the female child. It is suggested that this incomplete, undifferentiated, and often inaccurate picture of female genitals prevents the growing girl from achieving pride in femininity, and may lead to anxiety and confusion regarding her sexuality. A case is presented in which the failure to label the girl's external genitals was a contributing factor to penis envy, as well as to conflicts about "looking" which led to symptomatic learning inhibitions. It is suggested that the ubiquity of the female "castration complex" may not stem primarily from the fact that the clitoris is a smaller (and thus inferior) organ compared to the penis. Rather, the girl's feeling of being "cheated" may reflect parental failure to explicitly acknowledge that the vulva (especially the clitoris) is an important aspect of "what girls have." Because visible and sensitive aspects of the girl's genitals are not labeled for her, the girl may feel that she does not have "permission" to develop into a sexually responsive and complete woman. As in the case presented, penis envy may be a symptom expressing the wish to have one's female sexuality "validated," but which also serves to block this forbidden wish by inhibiting sexual responsiveness and pride in femininity.
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