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This paper examines the development of feeling norms underlying romantic love among early adolescent females. On the basis of data from in-depth interviews, transcriptions of naturally occurring discourse, and field notes, we find that girls not only acquire cultural knowledge about romantic love, but also develop several feeling and expression norms to deal with their own concerns about romance. These norms involve the relative importance of romantic relationships and the appropriate object of romantic feelings. Girls also use a variety of discourse strategies to communicate normative information and to reinforce feeling norms to friends, ranging from playful language activities to more serious modes of discourse. Yet, even though girls obtain normative information about romantic love, they do not always abide by feeling and expression norms
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